Becoming a mother
Becoming a mother
Fashion host, writer and stylist.
On January 6th after 38 weeks of counting down the days I experienced the most profound and life-changing moment; I became a mother.
There are so many stages to pregnancy, it isn’t as simple as three trimesters mentally or physically; every day and week is a small personal victory and thank goodness it is nine months long because I definitely needed that time to get my head around what lay ahead. As the youngest of five children and an auntie to many I have always wanted children (don’t ask me how many it’s far too soon;) the hustle, bustle and chaos of family is what I am used to.
It has all felt surreal, from that Sunday in April when I found out I was pregnant to today, writing this with my son Grayson on my chest; it sounds silly but having a baby was what grown ups did, my big sisters or older friends, how unbelievable that we were ready to start a family.
The rush of heart-thumping love is overwhelming and difficult to describe.
There’s a lot of noise around pregnancy from overly opinionated mum bloggers to the media, the NHS, your Mum, your neighbour; block out that noise and protect yourself, that is what I learnt to do, you have to just do you. Saying that, I do believe that knowledge is power so I went to the antenatal classes and read the recommended books but in hindsight nothing really prepares you for that moment and those early days.
The arrival of our baby boy has put my everyday into a different perspective, it’s like a different time zone; it’s not night or day because we are on our own clock, well his clock to be honest because he’s the boss. It’s funny because you know it will be huge but the rush of heart-thumping love is overwhelming and difficult to describe; in a moment you are confronted with the reality that your life has changed forever in the most incredible way and it’s both exciting and terrifying and every emotion in between.